‘Just One Bonkoski Party’ ~ February 4, 1999

David Heiller

There are times when I wish I could be someone one else, just for five minutes. Such a moment came last Friday, when I was buying a banjo.

I sat in the Homestead Pickin’ Parlor in Richfield with a beautiful banjo in my lap: Several people sat nearby listening to me.

Not that they had much choice. When a guy is playing a banjo, about all you can do is listen or walk away. It’s hard to carry on a conversation in the same three-block area, let alone the same room. Might as well listen. That’s what makes the banjo such a popular instrument.

But just this once, I thought in the way back of my mind, just this once, for five minutes, let me be a brilliant banjo player. Let me be Earl Scruggs. Or Reed Martin.

I won’t bore you with a lot of banjo lore. BUT for three-finger banjo, “Scruggs-style” playing, Earl in his prime was the best. The style is named after him. Many people know his music, especially the theme song to Bonnie and Clyde.

David loved playing old-time music best of all. 
I do not think he had any idea about how good he was...

Reed Martin is not a household name by any means. But he is without doubt the best old-time banjo player I have ever heard. It’s a different style than Earl’s, but equally beautiful in the hands of a master.

So I sat at Homestead and thought, Let me see the jaws drop and the eyes widen and the grins spread on the guys listening to me. Let me see the people in the other room come running to see who the heck is playing that well.

Moments like that come every so often, when you have center stage and you would like to be the best, or even pretty darn good.

Or they come, for me at least, when I hear what sounds like perfection. A perfect voice. A perfect violin solo. Then something inside me says, I’d like to do that. Just once, Lord. What Ι can Ι give you in trade?

Cindy and I even joke about this. When we hear something that sounds fantastic, that we’d like to be able to do, we’ll often say, “Just One Bonkoski Party.”

It’s a joke we have that stems from the good old days when I would just once want to be the life of a Steve and Barb Bonkoski party and stop everybody in mid-sentence with a dazzling banjo solo, or a spine tingling rendition of Ave Maria, or a flawless Moonlight Sonata on the piano.

It never happened, except in my imagination. But now when I hear something really fantastic, like Reed Martin or Earl Scruggs, I think, “Just One Bonkoski Party.” Let me do that.

I thought it would be fun to put a local angle on my delusions of grandeur. So with trepidation, I ask the following question.

Wouldn’t you like to be able to:

 Sing like Don Hogquist? Or Elaine Laposky?

Installing the BEAUTIFUL kitchen he crafted...
Who wouldn't want to just once accomplish
 something like Dave Landwehr?

n Build a kitchen like Dave Landwehr?

n Build a house like Daryl Klocke?

n Take pictures like Craig Blacklock?

n Direct a play like Kathy Ebnet?

n Skate like Jason Brabec?

n Run like Dustin Hejny?

n Play basketball like Andrea Bennett?

n Coach like Pat Dewey?

n Cuss like Del Delaney?

n Play the accordion like Red Hansen?

n Write like Hertha Hansen?

n Quilt like Cora Abrahamsen?

n Remember names like Bruce Bohaty? (“Hi Dave. Hi Bob. Hi Sharon. Hi Jim” etc, etc.)

n Teach like Dee Jensen?

n Draw like Linda Schaumburg?

Play the accordion like Red Hansen. 
David was very happy
 to play WITH Red Hansen!

n Grow flowers like Pat Ring?

n Operate a back hoe like Dave Jensen?

n Sew like Arlene Alleman?

n Shoot the breeze like Rocky Kroon?

n Type like Lynn Storrar?

n Be friendly like Joanne Carlson?

n Proofread like Hazel Serritslev?

n Fix an engine like Jim Kephart?

n Sell ads like Donna Cronin?

n  Play the guitar like Dave Wίlen?

n  Preach like Owen Christianson?

n  Kiss like Deb Oft? (An old college girlfriend.)

n  Bake bread like Cindy Heiller? (Maybe I should turn those last two around.)

n Be patient like Steve Popowitz?

n Fix a furnace like Gary Drilling?

n Shoot a rifle like Liz Espointour?

Alas, poor David, but he 
seemed to make do, just fine.

n Dance like Jennifer Kvam?

n Fish like Bob Dutcher?

I hope I haven’t offended somebody by leaving people off this impromptu list, or by putting, them on. This is MY list.

Feel free to put your name in the propel you feel slighted, or take if off if you feel unworthy.

I know what some of you are thinking keep doing your best, Dave, That’s all you do, Dave. Don’t try to be someone you’re not Dave.

I believe that too. Ι tell it tο my kids, and myself, all the time. Most of us mortals don’t have much choice.

But still there are those moments, like at music store last Friday, when the time is perfect, and I think, “Just One Bonkoski Party.”