David Heiller
“Where
are all the water bottles?” Cindy hollered from the kitchen on Monday
morning. “I just bought two new ones a couple weeks ago.”
“I threw
one away. It had a leaky top,” I shouted back. I won’t tolerate a leaky water
bottle.
“Where
are all the others?” Cindy persisted.
“Water bottles are like jackknives.
They have a life of their own,” I answered. I felt very wise with that analogy.
The wisdom part didn’t last long. It never does. But it did get me thinking
about things—supposedly inanimate things—that
come and go seemingly of their own free will.
Water
bottles are like that. Cindy and I both carry water bottles with us. One day
they are sitting on the counter. The next day not a one can be found.
Cigarette
lighters fall in the same category. We only use them for lighting the sauna and
burning trash. Some days the junk drawer is full of them, and on other days we
can’t find any.
How about
socks? How can one sock so consistently disappear? Eventually the missing sock
turns up, but not always, as the basket of unmatched socks in the laundry room
testifies.
To me,
jackknives are the granddaddy of self-motivated things. They disappear and
re-appear almost on a daily basis. That’s aggravating, because I tend to
become attached to jackknives in an emotional sense. (And you ladies didn’t
think men had feelings.)
Sometimes
you can guess how the jackknife disappeared. I remember going on a winter
camping trip with my son several years ago. I gave him my Schrade Old-Timer, a
knife that I had bonded with. But the trip was a bit dangerous and I wanted him
to have the best knife possible. We came back safely. When I asked for the
knife a few days later, Noah said he couldn’t find it. I figured the knife was
in a pair of pants that he had worn. But his pants had disappeared too, as you
will understand if you have teenage children.
David and the Christmas of jackknife-gifts. |
I could go on and on about knives I’ve
lost and found. But I will end on a serious note. People do get attached
to certain items. Jackknives are one of those items for me. I have a couple that
I really, really treasure. One used to be my dad’s. I never knew my dad. He
died four months before I was born. But the knife was in our family when I was
growing up. My brother Danny and I used it a lot. Someone—probably Danny—snapped
off a blade when he tried to pry something with it. The other blade didn’t
close all the way, and if you reached for it carelessly, it would stab you. Remember
how I said knives had a life of their own?
Danny had
the knife for many years, and one day he gave it to me, which meant a lot. I
had a friend grind down the broken blade so that it now has a point and can be
used. Another friend fixed the other blade so that it closes all the way and is
no longer a threat. Now the knife is better than ever.
This
knife has a wooden handle that has soaked up decades of sweat and dirt, mine,
my brother’s, my dad’s. I showed it to a knife dealer a couple years ago,
thinking it might be unique. He said it was called an electrician’s knife, a
very common knife, not valuable at all. Except to me.
My other
special knife is a battered Swiss Army Knife. My wife gave it to me for our wedding
21 years ago. It has disappeared a time or two, but it usually comes right
back.
I keep a
close eye on it, but I keep using it. I don’t want to tuck it away in a drawer.
It’s important to keep using knives that you like. That’s what makes them
special. You shouldn’t hide the things you love.
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